Saying no, could save your dream from flatlining.
Do you feel like there is never enough time in the day?
You’d like to read that book, start yoga or perhaps even find that thing that you are truly passionate about. Then work gets busy. Your weekends fill up. Life gets in the way.
I’m sure you are popular at work and loved amongst friends. A real reliable sort. You like to make other people happy.
You’re a yes junkie.
Sure, ‘yes’ has its place. It opens doors.
But like with any other addiction, saying yes too frequently has its repercussions. Saying no could be the thing that saves your dream from flat lining.
Say yes, with a no.
Saying ‘no’ may seem counterproductive when you are trying to pursue a goal but humour me for a moment.
Prioritising time for yourself, creates space for your thoughts. Big ideas demand that kind of respect.
Say yes to yourself, by saying no to unnecessary commitments. Say yes to making your goal the priority and no to taking on another ‘quick piece of work’ for your colleague.
Suddenly you won’t have so much on your plate. Free time for activities that serve your purpose.
In the words of Warren Buffett, ‘You’ve got to keep control of your time and you can’t unless you say no. You can’t let other people set the agenda for your life.’
Say no, politely.
Woah there sassy cat. Before you unleash your new found love of the word ‘no’, let’s set some ground rules.
Its important to be true to yourself and kind to others. Saying no to something because it will negatively impact you, is different to saying no just because.
Don’t sit on your no. Tell them straight up. People prefer directness so that they can get on with their plans. If you take too long, you could let them down.
Be gracious. They asked for your help. Thank them for thinking of you. Show them that you appreciate being included.
Give an honest explanation. You need to be upfront here. People respect honesty and most of the time will understand that other things can take priority.
Offer an alternative. Where appropriate, you may be able to offer assistance in a less time-consuming way or on a day when you have more time.
Show up, by saying no.
No one wants to hang out with a grump.
If you are overstretched and exhausted, you are not being your best self. If you feel yourself cringing when someone asks you a favour, this is likely where you are at.
It’s time to cut yourself some slack and show up when you are feeling shiny.
That way, when you do something you do it with purpose. You do it with happiness and enthusiasm. You allow yourself to be present.
Your friends, colleagues and loved ones will thank you.
Use your ‘no’ time wisely
You’ve said no and now you’ve got ALL the time on your hands. What are you going to do with it?
Something that fulfils you and lights you up of course.
Put this time aside and attack it with purpose. Set yourself some small goals of what you’d like to achieve and get started.
Even the tiniest step forward, is momentum. Before you know it, you’ll be on the path to pursuing your dream, that thing that lights you up, that thing you were made for.
Haven’t found your thing yet?
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